“When you react, you let others control you. When you respond, you are in control.”– Bohdi Sanders 

How you behave in your interpersonal relationships says a lot about your emotional evolution. The way in which you communicate and how you react speaks to where you are in your development and how far you yet have to travel.

Coping mechanisms are the coping styles we develop along the way to help us deal with what’s going on in our

Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes. – DSM IV, NPD Criteria

if you’ve ever seen a somatic Narcissist walk past a mirror and glance admiringly at their reflection or bore witness to a cerebral Narcissist engaging in a witty adversarial debate and come out the winner, you’ve seen the arrogant bent of their personalities emerge.

Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her – DSM 4

When Jealousy speaks, it says, “I want what you have.” When envy speaks it says, “I don’t want you to have it.”  For a Narcissist both aspects of greed come in to play. Envy is that spark of evil inside the narcissist, that is responsible for that insatiable longing that is never satisfied.

Empathy is the ability to comprehend the feelings of another; to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. For a Narcissist this ability is impaired. What this means is that entering into a relationship with someone who lacks empathy is setting yourself up for feelings of pain, hurt, grief, confusion, betrayal and shock.

Is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends. – DSM4

When a parasite attaches itself to a host it doesn’t concern itself with whether or not the host wants to be fed upon. It doesn’t care about the host’s well-being. All it cares about is, where it can get the resources it needs to survive.

Has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations.  DSM 4 Narcissistic Personality Disorder Criteria

To have a sense of entitlement means to have an expectation. An expectation that I deserve something for nothing because of who or what I am.

Requires excessive admiration – DSM IV

The need for attention and admiration is really at the crux of Narcissism.  A Narcissist’s low self-esteem, insecurity and a fear of abandonment mean that they are always seeking validation from outside sources.