The need for attention and admiration is really at the crux of Narcissism. A Narcissist’s low self-esteem, insecurity and a fear of abandonment mean that they are always seeking validation from outside sources.
Believes he is “special” and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions).
Many victims of Narcissistic abuse have spent sleepless nights agonizing over their Narcissist’s behavior. They get tripped up on trying to decipher intent and motive. The problem with that is, very often, a Narcissist’s behavior isn’t logical. It defies the laws of common sense and decency and for a non-Narcissist it’s very difficult to figure out.
*Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love – NPD criteria DSM4
Have you ever had a conversation with someone, who you know is rather arrogant, and all of a sudden, they start boasting something about themselves (their abilities, work, appearance, achievements, sexual prowess) that is so outlandish and obviously untrue, that you have to stop yourself from laughing out loud?
Loneliness is difficult at the best of times, but during the holidays, being alone can be excruciating for those attempting to put their lives back together. Going No Contact with toxic friends and family members is often a part of the healing process, while one learns who they want in their front row, who they need to remove and how to create and enforce healthy boundaries, with those that are left.
Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates accomplishments, talents, skills, contacts, and personality traits to the point of lying, demands to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements) – One of Nine Narcissistic Personality Disorder Criteria DSM 4
Once a person has gone through the process of ridding themselves of the toxic people in their lives, they will often find themselves all alone, or at least with a lot fewer bodies around. As they start to heal, they will seek out new companionship, looking for both new friendships and relationships. One of the many benefits of going through the healing process is that once you learn what dysfunction looks like in people, you tend to start seeing it everywhere, which leave most wondering, if emotionally healthy people aren’t some kind of mystical creature, like a unicorn or a white buffalo.
At the age of 23, Karla Homulka was arrested, along with her husband, Paul Bernardo, for the murders of 3 women. Homulka agreed to testify against her husband, who orchestrated the abduction, rape and murders, in exchange for a 12-year sentence.
