My heartache was tangible and the air was thick with loneliness, as the sound of laughter flooded in through my bedroom window. I was trying to cope with my new life alone, no spouse, no parents, no family and no friends, when my new neighbor’s merriment permeated the silence.

Limited Contact: A state of partial interaction, that one partakes in for certain occasions, with abusive or toxic family members, whereby one is able to remain in contact and on their own terms with those that they would otherwise have no contact with.

Ten years ago, I tried to get back into the dating pool after being unceremoniously kicked to the curb by my Narcissist. I was new to dating, having been in my abusive relationship for almost a decade and I realized very quickly that I had a lot to learn.

After my breakup with my long-term Narcissist I went through a phase of reaching out to people I hadn’t spoken to in a long time and I would try to make new friends everywhere I went. I was lonely and I was trying to put my life back together again with healthy activities and good friends to spend time with.

I sat on my client’s sofa showing them the comps in their neighborhood and explaining why it was a good time to put their house on the market. I was a year out from my ten year relationship with my ex-Narcissist and I was putting my life back together again.

In that year, I got my Real Estate license. Now I was out to conquer the world of home buying. I took a sip of tea, from the beautiful bone china cup and my phone started ringing. I looked down and saw that it was the big muscley, Vin Diesel type guy that I had just broken up with.

When you mix Sodium (Na) and water (H2O) together you will get an explosive chemical reaction. The same thing happens when you mix different personality types together with a dash of conflict.

When I was a young girl, there was a TV show called Fame that aired in the 80’s. It was about the experiences of young people studying at a school of fine arts. What was so memorable to me was a speech by Phylicia Rashad that occurred in the opening sequence of each episode. It went something like this, “You’ve got big dreams? You want fame? Well fame costs and right here is where you start paying – with sweat.”