I have a long history of dating dysfunctional people. The one thing I could always be sure of is if he was interested in me, there was definitely something wrong with him. Not because I was such a horrible person, but because it’s what I attracted – exclusively.

“If they aren’t treating you right, it’s time to stop blaming them. If you don’t want to be a doormat, get off the floor.” – Charles Orlando 

Being self-assertive is a necessary element of self-esteem. It means respecting and expressing our individual wants, needs and values and to proudly and boldly be our authentic selves.

Dating a Narcissist is like watching someone on a job interview. The initial impression is great. They’re charismatic, witty and charming. But once they get the job, they become the worst, most disgruntled employee ever. They’re antagonistic and downright miserable just looking to get fired.

Codependents want love. They seek it above all things. When parents teach their children that they are unlovable, it becomes the mantel they wear throughout their entire lives. It’s the reason behind the void they cannot name and it radiates throughout every adult relationship they will ever have.

At this stage of my healing, I believe that maintaining my inner peace and my level of positivity is essential for my well-being. Unfortunately, throughout our lives, whether it be at work, or in our personal lives, everyone, at some point, will encounter an emotional disruptor.

I often wondered about it, especially in the early going, how I would feel when I got the news that my ex-Narcissist ended his relationship, with the woman he left me for. There was never any question of it happening, only of how and when. I knew him. I knew his patterns, how he thought and operated. Hell, I even started a blog on it.

Back in our parent’s day, men chased women. Women had the goods, men wanted the goods, so they pursued. That’s just the way it was.  Times are very different now, the need to pursue is simply, just, antiquated thinking. “The goods” are a lot more easily acquired and with the simplicity of finding a mate online, you can pick and choose which relationships you want to put your energy into.