I’ve always had a contentious relationship with my mother. I grew up knowing that I wasn’t wanted. The theme of my childhood was – You’re not good enough. You’re flawed. There’s something wrong with you. You’re not valued. You’re not worthy of love…
My mother was raised by a Narcissistic father and a Codependent mother. She modeled the worst behaviors of both and took them out on her easiest target – me. She was unreachable and not emotionally present as a parent, and I interpreted her distance as rejection. Her sharp, unrelenting, criticism destroyed my self-esteem and affected me in myriad ways.