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Developing Self-Esteem Why A Narcissist Stays With Their New Partner Breaking Down the Codependent Coping Mechanism 7 Things Codependents Should Never Do In Relationships Your Environment is a Mirror of Your Self-Esteem The Importance of Positivity Stop Making Everything Your Fault: Interrupting Your Tape Cultivating Self-Respect Why You Should Have a Mentor 2017 The Year of You Surviving the Dysfunctional Christmas: Savannah’s Holiday Survival Tips Why Narcissists Ruin the Holidays Boundaries for Codependents Is it Loneliness or Dependence?: Battling Through the Hurt Your Well-Being Is Your Responsibility Beware That Call In The Middle Of The Night Stop Trying So Hard and Learning When to Let Go Stop Trying to Figure Them Out: Narcissists Don’t Think Like You Do Getting Comfortable in Your Own Skin Learning How to Love Only Those That Love You Keeping Your Dignity in the Face of Injustice Stop Being Other Person Focused and Let Go of the Need to Be Chosen The Subconscious Mind and Changing Your Core Beliefs Overcoming Feelings of Helplessness: You’re More Powerful Than You Think Codependency and Dealing with Crazy People Looking for Love Where It Doesn’t Exist: Stop Giving Away Your Power Savannah’s 13 Steps to Change and Leaving Abusive Relationships Finding Your Self-Worth Codependency and Allowing People to Experience Their Own Consequences Starving For Love: How Our Attachment Style Affects Our Relationships The Effects of the Narcissist’s Disappearing Act: Operant Conditioning and Learned Helplessness He Loves Me, She Loves Me Not: Interpreting Dysfunctional Relationship Behavior Identifying and Conquering Codependent Behaviors Lessons Learned From a Tennis Tournament Doubt, Codependency and the Law of Attraction Learning New Ways to Cope: Taming the Wounded Child Beating the Martyr Syndrome: Putting Yourself First The Importance of Strategy: When Codependents Leave Their Reactions To Chance Kicking Codependency To The Curb: Going Against the Grain – To Fix Or Not To Fix Letting Go Of The Need To Be Perfect Narcissists and the User Mentality: Investing in a Manipulator The Missing Pieces of the Narcissist When We Think We’re So Over Them That We Can Have a Relationship On Our Terms The Importance of Keeping Your Word and Communicating Your Needs Self-Sabotage and Codependency What Do Codependents Look Like Really? The Real Self, The Ideal Self and the Codependent Self When You’re More Concerned with How Your Date Feels About You Why It’s Not a Good Idea to Date Immediately After You Break Up With Your Narcissist Ex The Truth About Fixers, Empaths and Over-Givers No, He’s Not Happier with Her: Do You Want Scientific Proof? Narcissists and Betrayal The Truth About Adversity: The Will To Succeed The Year in Review: 9 Lessons We Learned This Year The Great Christmas Justification and Other Holiday Nonsense The Importance of Maintaining High Emotional Energy The Importance of Releasing Your Grief Energy Being Emotionally Honest Can Mean Standing Alone You Don’t Need To Catch Someone in the Act, Permission, Indisputable Proof, or a Private Investigator to Break Up With Someone Spotting Codependency at Work in Our Lives Healing the Inner Child The Many Faces of Denial: It’s Not Just a River In Narcissistville Working With Your Ex-Narcissist Do You Need to Talk? Skype With Savannah How One Woman Broke Her Narcissist Addiction How I Stopped Hating Myself The Power of Indifference The Practice of Self-Care Letting Go When It’s the Last Thing You Want to Do: Part 2 Letting Go When It’s the Last Thing You Want to Do: Part 1 The Relationship You Have with Yourself: The Most Important Relationship of All Making Molehills Out of Mountains: Minimizing Bad Behavior Narcissists, No Contact and the Spaghetti Technique The 7 Habits of People Who Succeed at Life Why Can’t I Get Over This?: The Never Ending Relationship How The Universe Tells You It’s Time For Change Loyalty, Obligation and Making Your Own Rules The Day I Knew It Was Time To Say Goodbye To My Best Friend We All Want Something Beautiful: Trying to Gain Self-Esteem by Proxy 5 Key Life Lessons I’ve Learned Along the Way But He Has So Many Good Qualities Cultivating the Will to Change: The Key to Motivation Anxiety Kings: A Narcissist’s Inner Battle Are You Afraid of Intimacy? Savannah’s Frequently Asked Questions Letting Go of the Need to Please But We’re Just Friends: A License To Disrespect Inside the Mind of a Narcissist: What’s Really Go On Understanding the Cheating Narcissist: Breakdown, Breakthrough and Breaking Free Are You Overly Critical?: Changing Your Childhood Schemas Healthy is as Healthy Does: The Behaviors of Emotionally Healthy People Your Relationship Behavior: A Barometer of Your Self-Esteem The Most Important Lesson I Ever Forgot Tools of the Trade: A Narcissists Guide to Crazy Making Self-Compassion: A Pillar to Healthy Living The Dance of the Manipulator and Fifty Shades of Savannah Grey Affirmations: The Key to Changing Your Self-Talk Burning Your Bridges: Taking the Ability to Retreat out of Your Hands Ghosts of Valentine’s Day Past When Your Need To Be Loved Supersedes Good Judgment: Becoming a Self-Love Warrior The Obesity/Self-Esteem Dynamic Do You Suffer From The Fixer Mentality? Getting Rid of Unwanted Thoughts and Feelings: The Emotional Freedom Technique or Tapping The Importance of Looking Back Before We Look Forward in the New Year Narcissists and the Amazing Holiday Houdini Act Dealing with Your Narcissist and Other Toxic People over the Holidays The Truth About Hypnosis and Savannah’s New Video Do You Engage in Fantasy Relationships? Are You Being Groomed For Abuse? Discipline The Key To No Contact The Objectificaiton of Women: From Exploitation to Oppression When You Keep Taking Them Back and the Narcissist’s Game How To Be Happy When You’re Heartbroken Interview with a Narcissist – Part Deux: The Return of Max So, You’re Codependent-Now What?: A Step by Step Strategy The Effects of Emotional Child Abuse in Adults The Violent Narcissist: The Battle for Control Healthy Love vs Toxic Love: ‘The List’ Understanding the Other Woman The Nine Signs Your Relationship is Over Standing On Your Own Two Feet and The Formula For Change Narcissists, Online Dating and Serendipity Leaving Co-Dependency Understanding the Parasitic Narcissist Narc Busting and the Making of a Co-Dependent Forgiveness: Letting Go of Anger, Resentment and Bitterness Learning to Trust Again Begins By Learning to Trust Yourself Fakebook: The Illusion of Social Media and Keeping Tabs on Your Ex The Making of a Monster: Causes of NPD Becoming Visible, Picking up the Pieces & Finding You Again Dating after Narcissistic Abuse: Red Flags and Sav’s Dating Do’s and Don’ts Confidence: A Pillar of Growth and Healthy Living The Pitfalls of Dating Post Narcissist Are You Addicted to a Narcissist?: Why No Contact is the Only Way Getting Rid of Limiting Beliefs: The Lefkoe Method Giving In the Name of Love Narcissism and Religion: A Perfect Match The Quality of Our Lives is Determined by the Quality of Our Choices: Learning How to Make Healthy Relationship Choices Falling in Love with Life: Being Present and Living in the Now What Your Behavior Post Break-Up Really Means Spotting a Narcissist: How to Get the Best Return on Your Emotional Investment I See Dead People…Uhhh I Mean Narcissists: Creating the Right Neural Pathways Growing Up Narcissist: The Narcissistic Parent and Child Abuse The Different Faces of Narcissism: Types and Sub-Types Finding the Courage to Walk Away Interview with a Narcissist Being Single is Not a Fatal Disease: Knowing Your Relationship Patterns The You Revolution: Slaying the I’m Not Good Enough Monster Being Authentically You: The Truth About Not Being Good Enough Finding Purpose and Meaning in the Pain Are You Mistaking Intensity for Intimacy? Understanding Trauma Bonds: Part 2 Why Do I Still Love Him?: Understanding Truama Bonds Empowerment: Taking Back Your Personal Power Give Yourself a Gift This Holiday Season: A Lesson in No Contact
 

Help! He Keeps Popping In and Out of My Life: Why They Keep Coming Back

2013 - Jun Posted by Savannah Grey 40

I had a reader tell me that a man she had dated had come back into her life. Years ago, this man moved into her home, never paid a dime in rent and never worked a day that they were together. He wasn’t kind to her two children so they left and moved in with her ex-husband. He wanted a new vehicle, but he had bad credit, so he got her to sign a 5 year lease on an SUV for him and within months, he cheated on her and left her for another woman. And now he’s back acting like nothing ever happened and she’s wondering why he’s back and what to do next. (more…)

 

Self-Esteem – It Really Is A Choice

2013 - Jun Posted by Savannah Grey 8

I get a lot of emails asking the same question, “It’s all well and good to say we determine our own worth and we are responsible for our own self-esteem, but _____happened to me. How does somebody just snap out of it and start to feel good about themselves after so much bad has happened?”

People are always looking for a quick, magical solution, that will instantly make them better.  As I grow and I acquire more and more experiences, I’ve come to learn that like most other things in life – learning to love yourself is a process. For me, I had reached a point where I didn’t like how I was feeling every day. I wanted to feel happy all the time. I wanted peace all (more…)

 

Are You Involved With A Broken Down? : Understanding When It’s Time To Fold Em

2013 - Jun Posted by Savannah Grey 11

The biggest mistake a lot of women make is they stick around way too long in their relationships. Many people absolutely dread the idea of breaking up and moving on, instead they prefer to hang on like the proverbial dog with a bone.

Often we get stuck thinking, no one else will want us, or we convince ourselves that we won’t feel the same way about someone else, or perhaps we are financially dependent, but the price we pay for being involved with someone who continually mistreats us, is our self-esteem. (more…)

 

Co-Dependency: When You Give Too Much

2013 - May Posted by Savannah Grey 12

If you have been involved with a Narcissist, an addict, someone with a compulsive disorder or anyone with emotional or psychological issues, you are about to have an Oprah Winfrey sized Ah-ha moment.

Many of you will see the word Co-Dependent and think, “I’m not an addict, this isn’t about me,” and you’d be wrong. If you are involved with these types of men, by the end of this post you will view things in a whole new light, you may just see yourself and your behavior. In the words that follow you will begin to have an understanding of yourself, your relationship and your life that has alluded you till now. (more…)

 

Narcissists in Long Term Relationships: A Case Study, Part 1

2013 - May Posted by Savannah Grey 78

I recently received an email from a reader in Texas. I thought it might be helpful to share her experience with others, to see just how gradual and controlling a relationship with an abusive Narcissist can be. In so doing, I hope that many of you will see the similarities in your own relationships and take the necessary action before you lose yourself, like this reader did.

                                                                      ***
I met my narcissist Dave when I was 24. He was unlike anyone that I had ever been with. He was really smart and beautiful and so different in very strange ways. Although he was gorgeous, his mom was a doctor, so he was always praised by her, growing up, for his intelligence. He was a Cerebral Narcissist. Looking back there were raging, red flags, that should have been enough to have me running and screaming far, far, away from him, but hindsight is 20/20. (more…)

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Translating Narcissistic Jargon: Actions Do Speak Louder Than Words

2013 - May Posted by Savannah Grey 50

I get a lot of emails from people that are confused about the mixed signals they receive from men in relationships. The hot and cold behaviours usually leave them unsure as to whether or not they are actually involved with a Narcissist. We have to be careful not to paint everyone with the Narcissistic brush, as even healthy relationships do have their ups and downs, but there are some pretty easy telltale signs.

You know you’re involved with a Narcissist when they exhibit several of the following behaviours: (more…)

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Is It Love, or Are You Seeking Validation?: When You Don’t Know Your Own Worth

2013 - Apr Posted by Savannah Grey 23

When we get rejected, treated poorly, or someone blows hot and cold in a relationship with us, we often become stuck and fixated on that person. We become convinced that we’re in love and we try over and over again to prove ourselves, to show the objects of our affection, that we are worthy of their love and attention.

We often don’t recognize that the reason someone isn’t interested in us may have absolutely nothing to do with us at all. We tend to internalize the rejection that it must be because we’ve been seen, evaluated and judged, as not good enough and that they are no longer interested. (more…)

 

Breaking Free: Why Breaking Up With A Narcissist Is Not Your Average Break Up

2013 - Mar Posted by Savannah Grey 221

Breaking up hurts. Rejection on any level sucks, no matter how you slice it.

Most people recognize that relationships end for all sorts of reasons. Some are nasty, some are amicable and some are mutual. But they generally follow the same pattern – relationship ends, one or both parties grieve and then move on.

Getting over a relationship with a Narcissist is a much different kettle of fish. Depending upon the duration, the impact of such a union could have profound emotional, psychological, spiritual, physical and even financial effects on its victims. (more…)