Learning to love yourself is among the most important work you will ever do here on this earth. When you come from a toxic childhood, where the message you kept getting was, “You’re not good enough,” it makes the task exponentially more difficult.
In Napoleon Hill and W. Clement Stone’s ground breaking book, Success Through A Positive Mental Attitude, the authors depict a story of a minister, who was home alone with his young son. It was stormy outside and his son was restless. He was in his study trying to write his sermon for the next day, but was repeatedly interrupted by the
Movies, television, music, poems and plays have forever romanticized the concept of unrequited love. While the notion of a broken heart might have been amusing during Shakespeare’s time, today the idea of chasing after someone, that doesn’t want you, should be outlandish.
A relationship usually goes through 4 stages. First you have two single people, next is dating, followed by a committed couple, which is then proceeded by marriage. People and relationships can stall out at any stage or remain at one stage for long periods of time.
Invoking jealousy, creating drama and forcing their partners to make impossible choices are just a few of the ways a Narcissist gets his fix and maintains control.
If a Narcissist can make you feel insecure and be the center of attention at the same time, they are creating their ideal scene for maximum payout. In their mind, to have more than one person wanting them, fighting over them, shows them that they are important, desired and worthy. It doesn’t matter that they have set the scene and
“Then you must make your future dream a present fact. You do this by assuming the feeling of your wish fulfilled. By desiring to be other than what you are, you can create an ideal of the person you want to be and assume that you are already that person. If this assumption is persisted in until it becomes your dominant feeling, the attainment of your ideal is inevitable..” Neville Goddard The Power of Awareness copyright 1952
I can recall, early in my dating career, many occasions where I really let myself down. There were plenty of cringe-worthy moments where I would let something slide or hold something in and never stand up for myself. My love interest would say or do something completely inappropriate and I knew if I spoke up it would mean a huge fight and the end of that relationship. It wasn’t that I didn’t know I was being disrespected and it wasn’t that it didn’t hurt me deeply, but my fear of rejection and abandonment was greater than my need to be treated with love and respect.
About the Author
Savannah Grey is a Freelance Writer, Hypnotherapist, Sports Fanatic and Philosopher. She has a degree in Psychology and is the founder of esteemology.com, a website dedicated to educating and healing survivors of abusive relationships.